My parents are bewildered ... "you're trying to get fired???"
It's amazing ... I'm feeling so much better, now that I don't give a flying fuck about my job. Quite the monkey off of my back.
I'm going to the river tonight. I'm so excited about that, even if i do have to bring my mom's dog with me. I need this. heh. maybe after this i'll be able to, you know, speak to people again. maybe even in person. wouldn't that be fucking amazing. i feel bad ... every time marge tries to talk to me, i'm otherwise occupied. Sleeping, sobbing ... i called last night but it was probably too late.
but yeah ... sand and sun and water ... michael ... it's all i really need ...
and i'll have my laptop with me, so i can still keep up on things ... heaven forbid i be disconnected ... cell phone may or may not be on ... i may just carefully screen my calls ...
and in two hours, i'm going to see the psychologist ... a little bit nervous about this, really ... she sent me this questionnaire thingy to fill out before our first visit, and some of the questions were a little tough to answer ... not difficult tough, but tough to own up to ... stuff i don't like writing down.
we'll see how it goes, i guess.