November 18th, 2004

eyes

chucks

and in the hell that was today (yesterday), i got new shoes ... almost like the old shoes ...

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gotta look at the positives ...

and i'm still awake, and still drinking ... i figure, what's the point of going to bed, when i've nothing to wake up for?
  • Current Music
    tom petty - don't come around here no more
black

domestic goth?

"domestic goth"

that's what one of the doctors at work called me the other day, and i'm going to take it as flattery. I asked him how he came to that conclusion about me, and he said, "well, you look the way you look, but you talk about your cats and your knitting."

I don't self-identify as "goth", but after a label is applied so many times, i just don't bother getting offended any more. if people want to see me in that way, it's no skin off my back.

i like being domestic. it suits me. i like snuggling with my cats on the couch with my knitting and a bottle of wine. Though i'm not yet good at cleaning, i like the satisfaction of a clean, neat room. I go out less and less now. Some of my reclusiveness is by choice, some by circumstance, but that's how it is. i love that my home is my home. i even like cooking.

i wish i had more opportunity to share it.

I talked to Cody for a while on the phone tonight, and it made me feel better. it's nice to know that i've got friends to talk to when i need to vent. And if anyone can understand relationship issues, it's cody - i used to live with her boyfriend, and i don't know how she does it.

i need to get my house in order.
i need to get my life in order.

why are the best things so difficult?
  • Current Music
    VAST - Thrown Away (Hollands Mcnaughty remix)
geisha - sinfest

it's not a sign, it's an excuse for bad behavior ...

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i rearranged the living room again. i get twitchy and do stuff like that. spaz out, move furniture.

my plans for a trip to monterey are coming together. all i'm waiting for is for michael to confirm his schedule, and then i'm booking the rooms. god knows we both need a vacation.

Suicide Club is a freaky movie. i shouldn't have watched it by myself.
  • Current Mood
    restless restless