November 18th, 2004



and in the hell that was today (yesterday), i got new shoes ... almost like the old shoes ...

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gotta look at the positives ...

and i'm still awake, and still drinking ... i figure, what's the point of going to bed, when i've nothing to wake up for?
  • Current Music
    tom petty - don't come around here no more

domestic goth?

"domestic goth"

that's what one of the doctors at work called me the other day, and i'm going to take it as flattery. I asked him how he came to that conclusion about me, and he said, "well, you look the way you look, but you talk about your cats and your knitting."

I don't self-identify as "goth", but after a label is applied so many times, i just don't bother getting offended any more. if people want to see me in that way, it's no skin off my back.

i like being domestic. it suits me. i like snuggling with my cats on the couch with my knitting and a bottle of wine. Though i'm not yet good at cleaning, i like the satisfaction of a clean, neat room. I go out less and less now. Some of my reclusiveness is by choice, some by circumstance, but that's how it is. i love that my home is my home. i even like cooking.

i wish i had more opportunity to share it.

I talked to Cody for a while on the phone tonight, and it made me feel better. it's nice to know that i've got friends to talk to when i need to vent. And if anyone can understand relationship issues, it's cody - i used to live with her boyfriend, and i don't know how she does it.

i need to get my house in order.
i need to get my life in order.

why are the best things so difficult?
  • Current Music
    VAST - Thrown Away (Hollands Mcnaughty remix)
geisha - sinfest

it's not a sign, it's an excuse for bad behavior ...

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i rearranged the living room again. i get twitchy and do stuff like that. spaz out, move furniture.

my plans for a trip to monterey are coming together. all i'm waiting for is for michael to confirm his schedule, and then i'm booking the rooms. god knows we both need a vacation.

Suicide Club is a freaky movie. i shouldn't have watched it by myself.
  • Current Mood
    restless restless