June 4th, 2005



So the plan changed ...

I ended up going with Tyler and Andy to Clockwork. I haven't been there in a while - it was the first club i ever went to, and i figured it would be a good start for tyler. by the time he's old enough for the good stuff, he'll be more than ready.

I had fun. danced almost the whole time. Tried to teach tyler to dance ... he'll get it eventually. Andy pulled his usual no-talking club routine.

fun aside, i'm a mess. my emotions are a fucking mess.

what happened today - and what almost happened today - at michael's house is not helping me think any clearer.
mixed messages all over the place.
he makes promises - but how could i believe the word of someone who could deceive me so thoroughly?
no decisions being made right now, i promise myself. take time.

the more i know, the less i understand.

i hate my emotions.
  • Current Mood
    cynical cynical