Went horribly hypoglycemic in the middle of everything last night, which doesn't help to make me any more rational or logical. Cranky and stressed, maybe.
I should find out today whether or not i'll be able to go to Monterey. I'll either be elated or totally let down, depending on the answer i get. If i don't get a vacation of some sort soon, i'm going to break. maybe i'm already broken.
I feel like something's missing from my life, there's a void that i'm trying to fill. drinking doesn't do it, pills don't do it, and i don't have many other options available to me. I don't want to feel like this for the rest of my life, but the way things look now, nothing even has a chance of improving for at least a couple years, and then there's no promises.
i feel like such a burden.