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I'm feeling really isolated lately. Don't know if i'm being paranoid or not, hard to tell sometimes. I'm so needy.

I'm also folded up in pain. I hate this shit. I want the whole setup out, i'll never use it anyway.

Work was fairly uneventful last night. Brought a cat back to life twice before letting it die. It needed to die. Coworker got pissed at me because i said it was a fun case - apparently that's not empathetic.

My brother's friends are over, smoking pot in the living room. lovely creatures they are. they invited me, i reminded them that i had dignity.

I'm halfway thinking about calling out of work for cramps. I can't even focus.


( 10 made me bleed — cut me )
Aug. 14th, 2005 11:51 pm (UTC)
Aw.. I can relate. I suddenly got this alienated feeling and it sucks horribly.

Perhaps a drive would help? maybe call someone on the phone?
Aug. 15th, 2005 12:43 am (UTC)
no one is home, and i have no where to go until i go to work in a few hours. eh. blah.
Aug. 15th, 2005 11:21 am (UTC)
As long as the owner didn't overhear...what's the big deal? I hate people, seriously.
Aug. 15th, 2005 09:37 pm (UTC)
Sarah got cranky at me last night for snuggling up to that big rottweiler and saying, "aw ... you're gonna die! yes you are!"

apparently using the cutesy voice doesn't makle it any less insensitive.

and you know how michelle is ... nothing i do will be good enough for the patients.
Aug. 15th, 2005 09:40 pm (UTC)
Sarah gets cranky about almost everything.

Did it die?
Aug. 15th, 2005 09:47 pm (UTC)
i think i get along with her better than most everyone, but only because i tiptoe around trying to keep her happy.

it didn't die while i was there, but i left at 0430. To be honest, the way it was being managed, i'd be pretty surprised if it didn't die.
Aug. 15th, 2005 09:49 pm (UTC)
I pretty much get along with her for the same reason - but I'm annoyed that I HAVE to tiptoe around her.
Aug. 15th, 2005 06:44 pm (UTC)
they invited me, i reminded them that i had dignity.

That's about where I feel on that now. The alure of "getting high" is about as moving as going out to clubs to try to get one night stands. Pathetically useless, except to satisfy one's need to escape. I can escape on my own without needing to do something immoral or illegal.

I know it has medicinal uses, but so does morphine and valium. Taking them when you don't need them is a poor way to go about life, IMO.
Aug. 15th, 2005 09:38 pm (UTC)
eh. i'm all over the morphine and valium, but pot just makes people into giggling idiots. i don't like being a giggling idiot.

can't argue with escapism, i just think that there are more dignified ways to go about it.
Aug. 16th, 2005 01:07 am (UTC)
They're usually giggling idiots before they smoke up.
( 10 made me bleed — cut me )

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