Yes, it is just being alive one more year, but I think birthdays work better than picking a random day, declaring it your own, and celebrating it.
I should be calling my doctor right now, but I don't even know what to say. This is getting worse by the the day. I was exhausted last night, but i couldn't sleep, just sitting in bed crying, and Michael there with me trying to make me feel better ... my body is rebelling against me in more ways than I'm willing to discuss here ... this just isn't right at all.
I feel bad for even trying this, so many things are all screwed up now.
I haven't felt this down in as long as i can remember.
And I can see myself being a really mean person ... but it's not myself ... i don't have much control over my personality right now. I snap at people I care about. This isn't me.
I don't think I'm coming out until i get this resolved. I'm going to go back under a blanket now.